Last Updated on November 14, 2019
Your family is made up of people who will always be there for you. They are the one constant in your life, and they play a big part in who you are and how successful you will be in life.
Sometimes your family can be a little crazy, though. Your mother may be constantly worried about you, and your dad may be hard on you and seem distant. Or, your siblings may be annoying and completely opposite of you. And, your uncles, aunts, and cousins, may get on your last nerve at holidays.
Or, if your family was toxic and you no longer speak to them, you may consider your friends your family and still have all the struggles that you would with a mother, dad, siblings, aunts, uncles, and cousins.
Or, you may have started your own family with a partner and/or children, and you want to ensure the happiest family life possible.
No matter what, it’s important to uphold some family values to maintain your closest relationships.
Choose The Core Family Values That You Want To Live By
It’s important that you first create a list of family values you want to live by. Doing so will help give you the motivation to use your affirmations, contemplate your affirmations, and start to believe your affirmations and make them a permanent part of your life.
Your list of family values may look like this:
- Lead with love in all situations and decisions.
- Let each other be unique and who they are.
- Have respect for each other’s choices.
- Be honest with each other.
- Give without expectations.
- Spend quality time together.
- Treat each other with kindness.
- Be patient with each other.
- Avoid talking about each other poorly.
- Have fun and laugh together.
- Support and encourage each other.
- Find a balance between my family life and my personal life.
Depending on your family and your situation, you may develop other core family values that you want to instill.
For instance, you may want to help your mom and dad when they can’t help themselves, or be kind to your sibling’s spouses and in-laws. Or you may want to seek outside help – such as counseling – with your family when things cannot be resolved.
It’s really personal to you, and as long as the value is loving and healthy, it will be good for you and your family.
4 Affirmations To Help You Maintain Your Family Values
Now that you have your list, you want to maintain these values. You need to ingrain how important they are in your mind so that when times get tough – and they will get tough once in a while – you will be able to maintain your family values.
1. My Family Offers Me A Sense Of Security
There will be times in life when things are going to get hard, and your family will be the only people you can turn to for a sense of security.
I know one man who didn’t uphold any family values and ended up not talking to his family for a decade. He struggled to maintain friendships because he didn’t uphold any values for his closest relationships.
Then, when he lost his job, became homeless, and was struggling to eat, he felt disconnected from everyone in the world and completely alone and in danger. He had no sense of security. He didn’t know how to reach out to his family because he had been so disconnected from them. And he wasn’t sure they would be there for him if he had reached out to them.
The fact is that your family can be a pain in the ass sometimes, but in times of need, you are going to want to connect with them because they will feel like a secure place to turn. Spending time focusing on your family values will ensure that you have someone to turn to when crisis strikes.
And, you may not think that a crisis is going to strike you, but life has a way of throwing really bad situations into your life on a moment’s notice. Major illness, bankruptcy, and divorce can suddenly change the course of your life. You don’t get time to rebuild relationships when this happens.
2. I Enjoy Having A Sense Of Home
Home is where your family is. Going home feels comforting and safe, and it gives you an escape from the world where people are angry, hateful, and ready to attack you.
Whether it’s the house you grew up in or a home that someone you consider family lives, you will feel a sense of home when you show up at their house.
By maintaining your family values, you will always be guaranteed a home to turn to when you need that comfort and escape.
3. My Family Expands My Awareness
One guy I know has a really crappy family. They shipped him off to Italy by himself when he was young to stay with people he didn’t know. They never really showed him affection, and his dad even abused him. His mother is a complete victim in life claiming that everyone is out to get her and nobody loves her. His sister is messed up because of their upbringing and has a warped sense of right and wrong. In short, his parents didn’t establish a healthy sense of family values.
Yet, he still upholds some family values on his end, despite how they have treated him and continue to treat him.
Why? He says because while his family may not be the best family out there, or even close to the best family out there, he has learned a lot about who he is and who he wants to be in life. Mostly because he has learned from them who he doesn’t want to be in life.
His awareness has allowed him to develop strong family values with his wife, close friends, and extended family.
He credits his hard life with his family for making him the loving, independent, and caring person he is today. And, his wife also gives credit to his family for making him into the great man he is today. Together they uphold some family values towards them despite how crappy they have been to him.
A few of their values include:
- Be there for them when they need help.
- Speak kindly but honestly.
- Have patience with them because they are doing the best with the awareness they have.
- Do not let them get away with mistreating them: stand up for themselves, correct their bad behavior, and leave the situation if they can’t treat them with respect.
These are just a few of the family values that allow them to maintain the family relationship without compromising their happiness and health.
4. I Choose To Live With Family Values That Are Healthy Despite What Others Choose To Do
Don’t ever doubt your influence over others. Your family may not hold the same family values you do, but that doesn’t mean you can’t influence them in a positive way by upholding some healthy family values of your own.
Moreover, you never know who you will affect down the line. For instance, your siblings may have horrible family values, but you may affect your niece or nephew in a positive way and give them the strength to develop better family values when they start their own families.
Besides influence, the way you choose to live has an impact on your happiness, success, and quality of life.
If you live in line with the values that you know are healthy and good, then you are going to feel better about yourself at the end of the day. Doing the right thing that doesn’t hurt anyone will always feel better than doing the wrong thing that causes anger, pain, and suffering.