Last Updated on November 15, 2019
Communication is what keeps relationships alive. You cannot stay strong, happy, and fulfilled in your relationship if you do not communicate. But, we often take communication for granted, limiting it to ‘How was your day?’ and ‘What do you want to do?’ We don’t take advantage of the time we have to communicate in a way that helps us get to know our partners on a level that nobody else will ever get to know them. That’s where this challenge comes in. It encourages you to ask each other one question each day and discuss it.
5 Reasons To Take This Relationship Challenge
1. People Change – Stay In Touch With Your Partner
You may think you know something about your partner until you sit down and talk about something you haven’t talked about for a while.
When we are dating, we ask our date all types of questions, but once we get into a relationship with them, we tend to think we know them and stop asking so many questions.
The problem is that people change, and your partner may be developing new beliefs as they experience new things. If you don’t talk to them about it, then you may never know. That can lead to misunderstandings and fights, all of which can lead to a broken relationship.
2. It Keeps Things From Going Stale
When you were dating, you asked lots of questions. It was fun to get to know the person you were with. Just because you have been together for a while, doesn’t mean you have to stop that feeling.
When you think you know everything there is to know about someone, things get boring or stale. That’s when the relationship can suffer.
But, when you are always asking questions, and talking about new and thoughtful things, your relationship feels alive, just like it did when you were dating.
3. It Helps You To Validate Each Other
Part of feeling valued and part of a committed relationship is validation. You want to know that what you feel, do, and think, is valued by your partner. Answering questions – and sharing personal things with your partner – can help you get that validation and feel connected on a level that you should feel in a committed relationship.
Again, that’s something we do when dating. Our date tells us something, we acknowledge what they say and let them know that we like that about them, and they feel better about us and forming a relationship with us. And, vice-versa.
4. It Helps You To Talk About Some Big Things
Imagine being able to share anything with your partner. That’s what constantly talking about new things gives you the confidence to do.
Sometimes we don’t want to share things with our partner because we are scared they will judge us or not understand. But, once you start asking questions daily, you will build trust that your partner is willing to hear anything you have to say without judgment or ridicule.
By the way, if he or she does ridicule you when you do share things with them, then this isn’t the right relationship challenge for you; in that case, you may want to start by challenging yourself to seek counseling.
5. It Encourages Daily Quality Time
Quality time is essential to a relationship, and by making it a priority to sit down and discuss a question each day, you are making quality time a priority.
Make Time For This Challenge
You don’t need to sit around and discuss things for hours. Maybe you can add this to your breakfast or dinner routine. Where you eat, talk about things, and then go on with your normal routine.
Or, maybe you can add this challenge just before bed.
Do what works for you. Dedicate at least 15 minutes to talk, though. That way you won’t feel like it’s too big of an obligation when you have a busy day, but you will feel like you at least sat down and made time for each other.
You can come up with your own questions where you each sit down and write out, on a small piece of paper, questions you’ve been thinking of asking or want to discuss. Then throw them all into a jar. Then, as you come across other things that you want to discuss, you can add to the jar any time you want.
You can also check out this eBook with 1000 questions on areas such as feelings, spiritual matters, health, holidays, sex, and more.
Or, you can do both. You can get the book and write out your own questions, and have many years worth of daily questions to ask each other.
Note: If you think that it’s impossible to have something new to talk about for years, I need to tell you that you are wrong. I’ve been blogging on specific topics for 10+ years, and I always have a new thing to think about, learn, or write about.
How Long To Do This Challenge
Many of the challenges here are 30 days, but I wouldn’t put a limit on this challenge. Keep gathering questions. Make it a habit to sit down daily and discuss a question. It’s so beneficial to your relationship to sit down and talk that you may want to make this a relationship habit you always implement in your relationship.