Last Updated on October 8, 2020
“What am I doing with my life?” There comes a time where we all ask this question. Whether it’s because we are unhappy, feel unfulfilled, or think we should have done more by now – the question can make us feel regret, pain, and confusion. There’s no point in ignoring the question because it will come back again and again, and more regret, pain, and confusion will follow. So, how do you confront the question, “What am I doing with my life?” and come out the other side feeling good about yourself?
Accept Where You’re At First
If you are asking, “What am I doing with my life?” then you are likely not totally happy with what you’ve done and where you are at.
It’s essential to accept what you’ve done and where you are in life before you can move on. If you don’t, you will always come back to regret and it can keep you from moving forward and doing things with your life that have value to you.
Affirm to yourself that you have gotten to where you are by making the best choices you could make at each stage in your life.
You chose to take a job, get into a relationship, and do things with your day because you thought they were the right things to do, for whatever reasons.
Accept that your life has been a road of choices and you wouldn’t have chosen any other path then you are on now because the choices you made were based on the best information you had.
10 Ways To Confront The Question, “What Am I Doing With My Life?”
As with everything in life, there is no one right way to find an answer to the question, “What am I doing with my life?” You may get an answer you need from one or more of the following tactics.
1. Ask Yourself If You Are Doing What Feels Good To You
If you are, then you may be wondering what you are doing with your life because other people have put it in your mind that you need to do more or be more.
That’s not the case.
If you are doing what feels good to you, then you are doing good things with your life. You are doing things that make you happy and give you pleasure. You are doing things that fulfill you and make you a better person.
Often people say, “I don’t think I want to have goals; I just want to be happy.” If that’s you, then just be happy!
I don’t know who decided that everyone needed to constantly have big goals in their life and do amazing things. Some of us do need goals and accomplishments to keep us happy, but some of us are happy just living and enjoying life, and that’s perfectly fine.
If you feel good, then stop asking yourself what to do with your life and just keep doing what you are doing.
2. Take Something Like Lifebook
Lifebook is a structured course that helps you take a deep look at ALL areas of your life and figure out what you’ve been doing, where you are, and where you want to go.
Because it is so structured, if you feel too overwhelmed to look at your life and figure out what you need or want to do on your own, Lifebook can help.
3. Use Writing Prompts For Self-Discovery
Getting everything out of your head and onto paper is one of the best ways to dig into your life and answer some questions that you need to be answered, including “What am I doing with my life?”
Take a journal prompts challenge and consistently dig into your life in areas that you need answers to. This is going to help you become a pro at diving into issues in life and breaking things down into smaller, more manageable aspects.
Or just sit down, write one or two words that represent what you are most struggling with, and branch off those words with thoughts and ideas. Don’t limit yourself. Be honest. Be brutally honest. Say things you wouldn’t say to other people because you want to get everything out and make discoveries that don’t come from being quiet and holding back.
This sounds unstructured, but you will be amazed at how one thought can lead to another thought, and soon you are finding answers in yourself that you didn’t even know you had.
Here’s an example:
4. Mind Map Where You Are To Where You Want To Be
There are a million different ways to use mind maps. They are similar to journaling, but you can connect one thought to another thought and map your way towards ideas or what you want.
For example, you can create a mind map like this to answer the question, “What Am I Doing With My Life?
You can make more notes off of every point in your mind map. In fact, you could start a new mind map off a point in this mind map. For instance, ‘create new habits and build structure in my life’ may be a starting point for a new mind map where you map out how you are going to do that.
5. Take Full Responsibility
Sometimes we ask ourselves something like, “What am I doing with my life?” and then blame other people for where we are and what’s holding us back. That doesn’t lead us to a place where we can get answers that help us figure out where we are and where we want to be or what we want to be doing.
Therefore, every time you ask yourself a question about your life, take full responsibility. Approach the question from a place where you, and only you, are going to be able to find the answers you need and implement solutions to move forward.
That will help you get rid of the clutter emotions and thoughts that can hold you back from figuring out what you want to do.
6. View The Answer As A Blank Canvas With A Lot Of Potential
If you are asking yourself, “What am I doing with my life?” then you might get overwhelmed at all the thoughts about what you’ve done, where you are, and where you are going.
Try visioning your future as a blank canvas, which is essentially what it is. This will help you see that your future is not set in stone and that your actions today are going to determine your future.
Then you can start to create a mind map or journal in a way that helps you fill in that blank canvas with pretty colors, words, and visions that will make you excited for tomorrow and the next day and so on.
7. Find Empowering People And Listen To Them
Look for people who know what they are doing with their lives and follow them wherever you can. Listen to their talks, read their articles, follow their social media, and even ask them questions. Get to know how their mind works and how it helps them figure out what they want out of life.
Even though you are in control of your own life, other people can often help you see things from a different perspective or bring ideas into your life that you’ve never thought of before.
The bottom line is that if you can’t internally figure out what you are doing with your life, then you may need to look for direction outside of yourself. Other people can help you see past limiting beliefs you have and discover new avenues to take that you may not think you can take.
This is why I recommend Lifebook. Listening to Jon and Missy Butcher, who absolutely know what they are doing with their life, as well as interacting with others in the community, can really help you get some ideas of what you want and what to do with your life.
Look For Mentors
You can also find mentors to help guide you as you go through life. This can be someone who is where you think you want to be or just someone who you admire for their abilities, characteristics, or attitude.
These people can help you see more of what you want in your life and figure out how to get it.
8. Dig Into One Important Area Of Your Life
I highly recommend looking at all the areas of your life to get a picture of what you want to do with your life, but if you want to confront the question, “What am I doing with my life?” immediately, one of the best things you can do is dig into the area of your life that has the most impact on other areas.
Often time this is health. If you are not paying attention to your health, that can impact all areas of your life including your family, social, career, financial and hobbies. You need the energy, both physically and mentally, to be able to live the life you want.
If you want to know what you should do right now to have the biggest impact on the rest of your life, focus on the area of your life that holds you back from getting what you want in other areas and try to improve it or change what you are doing right now.
9. Don’t Worry About Time
A lot of people find themselves asking what to do with their life as they get older and feel a sense of urgency as if life has already passed them by. But that’s not the case. If you are breathing, there is still life left and you should focus on what you want to do with it, not how much or how little there is because that’s just a distraction and a waste of time.
If you find yourself wondering ‘What should I do with my life?” at the age of 70, then view it like this: You have done a lot, but now you are ready for a different direction. You have a blank slate ahead of you and you can make the most of it by filling it in with what you want to do.
Focus on finding an answer to the question rather than focusing on where time has gone or how much time is left. Stay present and get on with life in a way that makes you happy and fulfilled.
10. Ask Yourself Similar Questions That Produce Better Answers
If you listen to personal development teachers or any successful person, they will all tell you to ask better questions.
Questions produce answers. But not all questions are going to help you get the answers you want.
“What am I doing with my life?” is a question. But it is a question that can sometimes lead us down a rabbit hole of regret and hopelessness.
More empowering questions can help us get more empowering answers. I would suggest that you take the challenge of acknowledging your value with 30 days of reflective questions. These questions are going to help you look into yourself and what you have to offer other people, which will help you answer the broader question of “What am I doing with my life?”
For example, the question, “Have I fixed problems that others could not fix?” can help you see where your strengths are and how you can use them to give meaning to your life and the world around you.